Rukmini: Week 5 - (Dance) Steps Toward My Culture
What other way to start a new blog theme, but with a little bit of rhythm? And a 5—a 5, 6, 7, 8!
My dance teacher hits the sacred brick with a stick. The sounds of bare feet, stomping on the ground, echo through the hallowed halls of bustling studio. “From the top!” someone yells.
Music from an old speaker starts playing, the sound of a high-pitched flute starts. The studio is quiet, filled with the anticipation of entering on the right beat. A singer starts off with a vocal riff, so our cue is coming up. We hear the first words of the song, and immediately start walking in.
“Walk like a dancer,” I was told.
“Allapadma,” is the hand gesture for representing something blooming or flowering in Bharatnatyam, an ancient form of Indian classical dance. The dancers in my school are taught this movement in their first year of dance (usually at the age of 6).
I joined my dance school when I was about 5 or 6 years old. I had done ballet and tap-dancing for 2-3 years before. At that point in my life, I didn’t really care about my heritage.
Sure, I knew I was Indian. However, at the ripe age of 6, I didn’t consider myself Indian OR American. I just knew I lived in America. Sure. I guess I’m American then. I was also told that my parents are Indian. Sure.
When I was young, I never understood more than the basics of what it meant to be “Indian-American.”
That’s where dance comes in. For the first time, I was being exposed to MY culture, outside my home!
The routines I drilled were how I learned to retell ancient stories and myths of India. Each of these stories are passed down through generations of Indians with many different mediums. In my case, it was movement.
There were so many stories. Each phrase, each meaning, conveyed through expressions, through movement. Every step in my dances meant something different. One wrong move, and I could be talking about an elephant versus picking a flower. Dance helped me retell the stories of my ancestors despite never speaking a word of their language.
I may not understand the songs. I may not understand the languages. I may never fully understand my culture while I’m in America. However, Bharatnatyam was my way of blossoming, or “Allapadma-ing,” into being Indian-American.
While I may now dance in heels or try hip-hop routines, I’m still a Bharatnatyam dancer at heart, with the stories of my culture ingrained in my muscle memory.
It’s been quite a while since I went to my old studio.
But, just like the dancers who came before me, once I hear the rhythm of my old teacher repetitively beating the sacred brick, the pitter-pattering of footsteps beating the ground with every beat, or the lilting voices of a faraway land, I’m sure I’ll remember the steps. I’m sure that faraway land won’t feel so far anymore.
A link to my first Bharatnatyam performance, which serves as a great reference!
Rukmini, I noticed that in this blog, you used imagery to make us feel as if we were in the dance studio with you during practice. With the sound of sacred brick and the stick, though I never heard it before, it was as if I knew what it was. Accompanied by your description of the footsteps against the floor and the ambiance of the room all helped me to imagine what it would be like. Though I never danced myself or attended any type of formal dance class, I could feel what it might feel like.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you used short, punchy sentences to convey your unaware young self when thinking about your culture and identity. I remember that one time when I was about 4 when I came to the realization that people were of different ethnicities and cultures. I guess we’re too engaged in our own world due to our young age that slowly, when we get older, we come to the understanding of the bigger picture.
I thought it was interesting that through dance, you were able to connect to your culture in a way that you may not have been able to have without it. Although you didn’t fully understand your language, part of you could connect even just a little through storytelling. And even when you change styles, you still are that person who carries that knowledge with you.
Hi Rukmini! I liked how you started off your blog with vivid descriptions of your childhood experience. It greatly resonated with me and brought me back to the dance studio with you, even though I have never done Bharatnatyam. I also loved how you incorporated your own photos and a video to your first performance; it really wrapped everything up nicely and I enjoyed viewing them.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to not fully embracing or understanding the labels that are being placed upon you. Honestly, until recently, I did not think too hard about what it means to be “American”; I merely accepted it, as I live in America, and moved on. Over time, especially this year, I realized what American identity was and how it could take many forms. Even now, I am still uncovering parts of the “Indonesian-American” term that came to describe me since birth, similar to how you did through dance!
Hi Rukmini–I really appreciated the imagery you used to start off this blog post! Instead of just saying something simple like “I used to dance when I was younger,” you took the time to set the scene and immerse us in Indian classical culture, something that makes this blog really enjoyable to read. Words like Allapadma and Bharatnatyam also complimented the picturesque and enthralling quality of this post.
ReplyDeleteI liked the insight you gave into the struggle of cultural identity (Indian vs. American). It’s something that a lot of us, including me, can relate to as people with ethnic backgrounds in other countries. And honestly, 6-year-old you kind of had a point–it’s complicated when you feel like you don’t fit into either category and seems like more trouble than it's worth to figure it out.
One last thing: The video of your first dance performance is kind of “the cherry on top” for this beautifully crafted blog. I notice that a lot of people (myself included) add the required hyperlink as an afterthought and add in information that’s related to the original post, but doesn’t really change how we see the blog. But being able to see your dance performance actually lets us experience for ourselves what you’ve been talking about, which adds an extra layer of dimension and interactability to the post.